how i found out & how i told him
We had been trying for about 6 months, which i know isn’t too bad. Some have to try much longer and go through much worse in order to start a family. But for me it felt like forever. I didn’t understand why it was so easy for others, while here we were, doing it when we were supposed too, and still…nothing. I took a test every month, even the times when I didn’t think it could be possible. It was way too hard to just sit and wait, but man are those things expensive! So this time, I went to the dollarstore and picked up one from there. After using it, the little lines appeared but they were so faint. I felt like my eyes were just forcing them to appear because I wanted it to be positive so bad. I debated going to the drug store to buy yet another expensive one, but thought ‘no…i will just wait a few more days and see’.
I bolted out to get a digital test, that way I could have to worry about lines appearing. I just wanted a yes or no!
I can’t even put into words the flood of emotions that went through me. Shock was probably the biggest feeling at the time. I just couldn’t believe that after all this time it finally worked. All I know is that I was happy. To say the very least, there were a couple tears. I caught a glance of myself in the mirror at the one point, and oh man…let’s just say I was kinda glad to have that moment all to myself. Mascara streaming down your face really isn’t a good look for anyone.
Another fun little tidbit about this story is that it was our 2 year wedding anniversary! I thought a fun way to tell Jose would be to incorporate the news in with our anniversary celebration. Also, photography is huge in both of our lives, so it only made sense to go that route as well.
Just for the record, yes I made this card. I realize it looks like a 4 year old came over and helped me out, but nope, all me. Hopefully this baby gets Jose’s drawing skills and not mine.
The look on his face when he opened the card was pretty much pure confusion. You see, there was a little bit of a health issue on my part (by way of an ovarian cyst) that seemed like it was going to put a halt to our baby making process for a little while. I was even on a list to have surgery, which would have delayed our trying for a couple months. This month was the last month to try, and we were both pretty convinced that it wasn’t going to happen. But as you can see, it did!
It’s a good thing I know Jose so well, because if anyone else was there to see this reaction they would think that he didn’t care. Jose’s emotions are always on the inside, very rarely do they sneak out. But his eyes got just the right amount of shiny and his grin was pretty big. And that was the perfect ‘Jose reaction’ for me.